Madonna, you’re the one WE Crave!

Madonna, you’re the one we crave. At this time, I managed to put together 26 fans (including myself) from 14 different countries on my 49th video! For those who remember, I had a similar experience back to 2012, coincidentally with with Madonna fans from also 14 different countries, on my Miles Away video.

This video is a continuation of my I Rise video. After performing for the first time as a drag queen, which took me more than 9 hours of recording, including a live performance on a gay club, I felt relieved and emotional. So I asked my boyfriend and my brother in law to capture all of that raw emotion. I really cried and it was because I felt exhausted, but most of all relieved and with the feeling of mission accomplished. It was also really intense, because of me coming from the most homophobic country in the world, Brazil, and feeling good for have had this experience as drag. It was like healing a childhood trauma (of my mother freaking out that someday I could dress up like a woman) and also feeling completely confident with myself.

Actually, I never had the desire to be a drag. I do respect and LOVE the drag community but it is just not my thing. I like to be a drag watcher, and not a performer. And because of this and being out of my comfort zone, the accomplishments feeling was even better. I’ve never felt so proud of myself. And the nice thing is that my boyfriend was supporting me since the very beginning, either being with me on stage, on the video or helping as cameraman. I love you Daniel, every day more and more!

I  also loved the final result, but I must confess that I almost gave up making this video. It was really hard to edit. The first problem was about the footage I got: lots of material in low resolution and also framed in the vertical. But I didn’t give up and was insisting with my fellow Iconers to have everything in the right way.

However, this was nothing compared to the nightmare I had one month ago, when my computer completely crashed. I panicked because I hadn’t made a backup. After days trying to repair it, I managed to recover the original files and at least part of the video project. I felt really like dealing with one of those thousand pieces puzzles. I t was so hard to assemble it, that I had some nights without to sleep and even thought about to make something simple or even give up. But it came exactly like I thought: a celebration of union, pride, love and friendship. I was also a proof that fans can support each other.

When the video cuts to Dark Ballet, it is really on purpose, because the majority of the fans on this video (if not all) are part of the LGBTQ+ community and we’ve been dealing with prejudice everyday. We are here as fairies, not as witches. We believe in our dreams and we crave Madonna, definitely.

I’d also like to thank all of you who made this video possible:

Fans:

Cameras:

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